The REAL Postpartum Essentials List

you don't need more stuff- you need this instead.

I do have a list of items that I enjoyed having in the days and weeks after my baby arrived but I need to preface this by saying: YOU DO NOT NEED TO BUY ANYTHING.
The amount of emphasis put on what one will buy or request on their baby registry- versus the energy put into understanding what new mamas and parents truly need- is astounding. It’s reflective of how consumer culture has convinced us that we can buy our way through postpartum and parenting.

New mums are stocked with a diaper tower, a pile of baby clothes, and a plethora of baby jail containers but have little understanding of what actually supports a healthy postpartum experience. Early postpartum is a critical time that impacts the long-term health and wellbeing of the MotherBaby dyad- and will have ripple effects on generations to come.

Patriarchy has broken maternal health and consumerism sold us the idea that buying more gadgets that drive separation of MotherBaby will fix it.

The main thing you REALLY need postpartum is at least one support person- e.g. a good baby daddy, a literal or honorary sister, someone who will be there day in and day out to FEED YOU.
Ideally they’re making nourishing home-cooked food (however, enough food is the priority) and bringing it to you in your bed.

If you don’t have postpartum support in place, focus on procuring that first- before you worry about putting anything in your amazon cart.

Ensure your partner/support team knows the importance of postpartum- and that their role is to take on the things that you usually carry. Call on your family/village or prioritize investing in someone who you can trust to hold space and nourish you during this very important season. (See “Men, not hormones, are the leading cause of postpartum depression” by ZAWN VILLINES for more on this subject.)

Here’s what you need to do: stay in bed with your baby, eat enough food, stay hydrated and warm, focus on bonding with and cherishing your sweet bebe, and rest and recover!
And did I mention eat enough food?
Women are socialized to undereat our whole lives and “bounce back” after having a baby- and it’s killing us.

The best time to start investing in your motherhood/postpartum experience, your village, and your community was 5 years ago- but the next best time is today.

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Okay now that I got that out of the way… I will tell y’all my list of items that can be purchased or even better, procured secondhand, that I enjoyed having postpartum.

In the first DAYS postpartum, ideally mama and baby are naked, in bed, together.

For this magical window of time I recommend having a good quality mattress protector (or two, so you can have one on the bed while the other is being washed). Sometimes the cheaper mattress protectors are noisy and plastic-y so get a good one that will not make your postpartum sanctuary feel icky. Along with that, natural fibre bedding that feels delicious for mama and is safe for baby’s sensitive skin is a nice touch. I like linen.

One thing about early postpartum days is that peeing can burn- even if you don’t have a tear down below.
A peribottle with lukewarm water solved all my problems in this department. I just kept it by the toilet and filled it as needed with warm water from the sink.

Another thing about postpartum is that you will be waking up at all hours of the night to tend to your baby, so it will be dark. A gentle night light will be helpful. A lamp you can turn on with a touch- rather than a switch- is ideal. But I also love a salt lamp because… vibes (and it’s probably more affordable).

Next let’s talk about breastfeeding.
Eating and hydrating well, having an autonomous, intact birth, staying naked and close with your baby, and feeling safe in your nervous system all create the conditions for easeful breastfeeding- far more than any pump, bottle, or gadget ever could.
Except… your nipples might still be in severe pain.
Maybe that was just me, and maybe I was being dramatic, but days 3-7 of breastfeeding were more painful than birthing a whole child through my vagina. (bless those birth hormones!)
An unscented, all-natural balm made with lanolin was the only thing that helped for my poor, chapped nipples.
(This pain is not everyone’s experience and many women say their pain is minimal, so you might not need this. But a lanolin-based balm will come in handy at some point in motherhood anyways so...)

While I recommend mostly remaining naked in the early days- to bond with baby, support breastfeeding, regulate baby’s temperature (No, you DON’T need a hat for your newborn baby!), and air out sore nipples and healing yonis- you may want cozy wool socks and slippers.

Okay, let’s talk about the early WEEKS.
If you listened to my earlier advice to have adequate support around you, you have stayed in bed and only gotten up to use the bathroom.
Now that a couple weeks have passed, you may want to venture outside for fresh air, take a short walk, and you may even feel the urge to “be productive” and try to do too much, too soon.
Your body will tell you if you’re doing too much- your bleeding may increase, and you might feel heaviness in your pelvis.
Listen and get back to bed.

That being said, for this stretch of time and beyond, I recommend slip-on shoes to leave by the door, so you don’t have to bend down or faff with anything in order to get outside while you’re holding a baby.
My favorite here is Crocs, but there are plenty of options- you probably already have something suitable.

The last thing I’ll mention- as a baby wearing enthusiast, is a good newborn wrap or carrier. I love a stretchy wrap for this season.
It’ll work from newborn only to about 3 or 4 months (if you’re lucky), so renting, borrowing, or buying secondhand is ideal.
Stretchy wraps are more approachable than woven wraps in my opinion, though wovens are a 1-time-purchase that will carry your babies through all stages of infancy, toddlerhood, and childhood.
Stretchy wraps are great for dad/your support person to use when mama is ready to have her first shower post birth.
Again, just a reminder that wraps are amazing and allow us to be hands free- but may tempt you to do too much too soon.

There you have it folks- my list of fewer than 10 items that had a positive impact on my postpartum experience. I didn’t include any pottying/diapering essentials because that feels like a whole other can of worms, but let me know if you have any questions!

You can find everything I mentioned linked here (ShopMy) and here (amazon). If you choose to buy through my links, I may earn a small commission. That said, I truly don’t want you buying things you don’t need. Like I’ve said throughout- source from your community first. Borrow, buy secondhand, share.

Facebook groups, apps like Vinted, and local email listservs can be incredibly helpful. Where I live, we even have a “sling library” where you can rent baby carriers.

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If you’re pregnant and you are thinking hard about strollers, baby carriers, and postpartum carts- but haven’t invested energy into learning about birth and postpartum physiology and what I mean by an autonomous, intact birth- pause.
Get accurate education on pregnancy and birth rooted in physiology. Learn how your birth is foundational to a happy, healthy postpartum. Know why you are choosing what you are choosing- and feel confident in your choices.

Because at the end of the day, no cart, registry, or “must-have” list will give you what actually matters. Preparing for pregnancy, birth, and postpartum is 100% your responsibility- but that doesn’t mean you have to do it alone.

You need rest.
You need nourishment.
You need people that will show up for you and remind you how amazing you are.

Everything else is extra. Share this with a mama that needs to hear it.